Musings

Missing you, my love

Its easy to say I miss you. I love a lot of people but do not necesssarily miss them. In fact, it doesn't take much to realise that this is a relative factor, when I say I miss someone, it may actually mean that I am just bored with what I have at hand. Often the feeling may be a result of an association with a person and a habit. Like I might miss someone because I happen to share my early morning tea with him and having it alone is not necessarily any less pleasurable, just might take a bit getting used to. All this is fine, except for the fact that when I say that I miss someone, this does not get translated. Rather it is taken matter-of-fact-ly, as if it is an obvious consequence of being in love :) While in fact there is hardly the time to miss anyone, and for how long can you do that?

Yet I have felt that there is another aspect of missing someone. To put it in someway, it may be the warmth, the feeling of someone's presence that comes when I think of someone I love. I mean the feeling is different when I think of you or someone else.

This feeling is at its purest when the person is not physically present and usually gets diluted when I am actually with the person concerned. When the extraneous things are just too many, I have to put an effort to locate this 'pure feeling' of just your presence So then why the longing to be close? Maybe the feeling intrinsically comes with a longing for something, and as a solution, we think just being close to the person will satisfy the craving, which obviously, does not happen :)

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Unfortunately, here are no such loopholes in missing you. Even if there are other things going on in my mind that could possibly have diluted the experience of your physical presence ( for example, seeking your attention, etc), they become too trivial when you are there and actually just your presence remains and that too, remains as quite an intense experience.

I felt kind of sad today, you know. But not the usual way. As if life suddenly felt too short and you too far away :)

posted by Bidisha @ 4:51 AM